MOTHERS

All I can say about mothers is that I have become bit milder since I've become a mother myself. My mother was not perfect as I am not perfect either to my children.

...and you don't have to have biological children to be a mother. In lots of ways, Lynn Ruth, you're the Jewish mother I never had but wanted for my children. Come to think of it, you are a mother to many "children" because of who you are...asshole parents sometimes still have the most incredible children and that's why I think conditioning is not everything: it's about taking charge and being a responsible individual.

The other night I watched this HBO show: Rosie O'Donnell had rented an entire cruise ship for gay couples and their children. I cried my eyes out over this one gay (male) couple with 4 adopted children: these two guys were the most amazing mothers...which just shows you: you don't have to have your own children or be female to be a good mother.

I wish you had had a better mother, Lynn Ruth, but we can't choose our path in life and have to play the cards we're dealt with. I don't believe in victimization and I know you don't either. Yet bad parenting is something we have to live with for the rest of our lives and I think the key is to distil the good and discard the rest. Your mother turned you into a survivor, into someone who will persevere no matter what, and life is all about perseverance and doing your thing regardless...or as Dorothy Parker said at the end of one of the most famous suicide poems: You Might As Well Live... that's what you're doing,Lynn Ruth and I admire you for it-- you are DARING to live in ways I haven't dared yet...